Food evolution

More photos of the dishes I created in the kitchen at Hollyhock centre on Cortes Island, BC and the beautiful English-inspired garden. Food is served buffet-style, often for 100 or more guests, with a short period to prepare and serve guests, often with a small kitchen team of varying skills. To keep the beauty and essence of the dish throughout service remains a challenge, but the taste, nourishment and love remains relatively the same.

Everything is changing all the time, you, me, the garden, the world, so why not a dish, evolving with each person that eats it? And instead of fighting it, of thinking my food would be more beautiful if plated, taste better only if I had a certain ingredient I can't get, and wishing I had more time and staff, I try to control the only thing I can, the present moment, breathe into it, and let go. Yoga practice has helped me a lot in cooking and in life. I learn every day from my cooking, and it's often not about the food. Food for thought.

Emotional suitcase

More good wifi, more food shots to share. Who knew that a perfect pairing with good food would be wifi? It's not a given here, nothing much is, you can't expect the things that I have been accustomed to at home like reliable internet and cell phone coverage, a transportation system, stores to buy things at if you need something, services like a hair salon or health related services like a dentist, doctor or acupuncturist.

It's been great in some ways to help me save money because there is no where to spend it, and at the same frustrating to get basic things done like get your hair cut. How do people do it on the island? Well, there are a lot of women and men with long hair here, they find friends to help them for the most part or get it done when they get to the "mainland".

It's been a good lesson for me about what's important to me, what matters most, and it's sometimes not what I had thought. I encourage you to get away and have this kind of experience, even for a short period, or at least imagine it in your mind. What would be really important for you to have, what is a want, what is a real need? If you only had one suitcase to bring for several months what would be in it? If you were on an island like this, what would you miss most?

Everyone is different. For me, as soon as I got to the ferry terminal at Nanaimo, on my way for my quick getaway to Vancouver for a few days, I saw a Starbucks and had to get a latte. I wanted it. I did not need it of course, but it nourished me in so many ways. I have a lot of good memories at coffee shops. This is where I meet friends, go for a break during a busy day, and where wrote a lot of my book.

We eat with so many senses besides our taste buds, and it nourishes us in countless ways. Many times here, I've had presenters and guests tell me that they love my food, that they can feel the love and care I put into the food, they can taste the difference. And this makes me very happy, that I can transmit love to others through my food, thereby nourishing their bodies and souls, and in turn nourishing me. That's one of the intangible but important things that I need. It's in my emotional suitcase, the one that I brought with me and didn't have to pay extra for to check-in.

A few more photos to share, mostly of food, one of a cooking class on Japanese cuisine that I held in our kitchen..

Photo descriptors of the food, all vegetarian, and mostly vegan and gluten-free, with as much from the garden as possible, including the flowers, which are edible:

-Carrot-walnut cake with cream frosting, chocolate drizzle
-Cauliflower and pomegranate
-Garden veg with sesame dressing
-Garlic scape-zucchini bake
-Making garam masala for curry
-Rice-lentil pilaf
-Spinach mountains
-Pasta bake
-Yaki manju with red bean
-Cooking class on Japanese cuisine as part of the farm-to-table program
-Rhubarb-berry crisp
-Watermelon feta salad
-Green beans and rainbow chard
-Butter with lemon and garden herbs and blossoms
-Cilantro hot sauce
-Roasted beet salad
-Shepherd's pie
-Indian curry with yellow daikon and red beet pickles
-Coconut cake

Caroline cooks at Hollyhock...

Well, I know you all want to see more of my food here, but it's a challenge for me because I don't have reliable internet at home, I have been working long demanding hours, it's so busy during my shift that I don't have much time to shoot photos, blah blah blah. But today the wifi connection was good for some reason, the first time in a long time. So before I head off to work, I wanted to share some food photos, my first attempt, so bear with me and wifi please hold on.

I serve daily anywhere from 50-140 in a buffet setting. For a dinner, I have to make in a few hours several courses with my small crew, including a main, sides, fresh bread (there are no bakeries on the island so we have to make our own and everyone seems great at it.. I'm learning), dessert from scratch. So it's not as beautiful and intricate food and plating as I'm used to and I like, but I'm trying to go with the flow, in both my cooking and life. It's a learning process!

However, I continue to try to make my food vegan and gluten-free as much as I can and provide good options for those who are when I can't. The food we serve is vegetarian with some fish and seafood. And I always try to cook with that magic ingredient I travel around the world with, love. Caroline

PS - I can't seem to attach descriptions to the photos and I know you want to know, so here you go..
- Strudel with raspberry-bumbleberry, whipped cream, coulis
- Summer lasagne with pesto-cheese, mornay, garden vegetables
- Carrots and chickpeas in a raspberry vinaigrette
- Green beans with slow-baked cherry tomatoes in a sesame dressing
- Chocolate brownie cake with strawberries and balsamic reduction, whipped cream
- Carrot cake with an orange cream frosting

Random words found

Perhaps not so random as they seem to describe me...

I have nothing but everything

"Travel light but there is nothing here," said a friend on Cortes. I was perplexed and frustrated by this but did as she told me to. In particular, because I had to take two planes, two ferries and cross over two islands, some of it hitch hiking because there is no transportation system here, no taxis, no shuttles. This is the way.

I was a bit hesitant at first and shy about hitch hiking being a city gal and having an overactive imagination but if that's the only way to get around the island, you have to do it and locals are happy to pick up people and transport them. They realize this is part of the responsibility of owning a car on the island, which seems like a luxury when you are walking or biking the hilly terrain to get to where you want to go. And this is part of living in community and in a human eco system where people talk to one another to get things done and want to make each other's lives easier.

Also, like most islands, and it is no different here, either the island likes you or it doesn't. If it likes you, then things come your way easily and if it doesn't, it spits you out and wants to leave as soon as you can. I am usually a positive person, though can have my moments of self-pity and victimhood like everyone else. I wanted the island goddess on my side, think she's a woman, so I prayed a lot to the island goddess and whoever to help me if I am to be here. I am spiritual but not a religious-must-go-to-church person, but I figure that prayer is like the icing on the cake. If it can't hurt, and might just help, why not try it? And the goddess keeps on saying "yes" loud and clear "you need to be here" and keeps on showering me with opportunities and gifts.

I have been blessed by many opportunities in my life and am grateful, or in other words, as my friend Angela says, "you have a horseshoe up your ass". I've had my share of painful and sad moments in my life, but I tend not to dwell with on them, and I realize as the famous author CS Lewis says, that you can not experience happiness without the sadness, it is both sides of the same coin. I believe that and these learnings, however frightening and painful they might be for me at the time, have made me stronger and what I am today. I have no regrets, or very little. Also I get by with a lot of support from my good friends, therapists, healers, the universal forces whatever they may be (not quite sure about who is out there but I believe there is someone out there) and most recently I am learning to become my best friend and be there for me instead of walking away, which I have often done in the past.

I really wanted to bring my bike but it was impossible with all the travelling I would be doing to get here. I just couldn't picture myself with my baggage and bike, so I had to sadly leave it behind. I thought the place I would be staying at would be close to work but it is a good 40 minute walk in the country with no lights. I work very early day shifts, starting at 5:30 am, or evening shifts, starting in the early afternoon and closing around 9 or 10 pm. I was anxious about getting there and back because I would be walking in pitch dark on new terrain with only a headlamp. When I told my boss about my concern, she said, "you have a flashlight right?" It wasn't in a mean or condescending way, but it was practical, direct and honest advice. The way around here.

After staying in this victimhood for a few days, and waiting for some miracle to save me in a more whiny way, I got more present and real. I needed a bike! Actually, I got one initially from a friend of a friend in Ottawa, but it was too small for me and rusty and painful to ride. So the first part of trying to manifest anything I realized is that you need to be specific. I started asking for a bike in Ottawa and got one, miraculously just down the street from where I am living here, but I didn't put in important words like in "good working condition", "fits me", "I can ride easily". You make think this is here say but those in the know will be nodding in agreement.

There are no towns on Cortes Island, only a few stores, and certainly no bike or other store where to buy or rent a bike. There is not even a bank. So I did what people do here, I started talking to people and asking them where I could get a bike, to spread the word. In a small community, it's like that phone tag game, and if you want something spread then say it to one person, and if you don't want something spread then keep your mouth shut.

By the end of the day, I had a great bike delivered to me that I was renting for the season from "the bike guy" on the island. He's the one people ask for help with their bikes, everyone knows that and all roads so to speak led me to him. He says he does carpentry work, but there is a need for people to repair their bikes and so he does it on his off time. He doesn't make much money at it, but he does it because it is needed. I hear that a lot from people here, they want to help others where and when needed, their community. A friend had her bike not working and he came to repair it at her place. When she asked him how much, he knew she didn't have a lot of money and said don't worry about it, just pay it forward. There are a lot of big hearts on the island, and the bike guy is one of them. Considering that he has a family with a wife and three kids to support, he needs money but it's not his main motive.

I'm learning...

- To manifest what I want, be exact though, and it won't work if you don't truly believe and trust in the process.
- With manifestation, there must be actions as well. You can't just sit there and wait, although sometimes things come unexpectedly.
- Ask around for what you want with an open heart. The big ask, as they say in fund raising. Though understand that you may get what you need and not want you want, from my experience.
- Get it, be grateful, and pay forward this good fortune and karma, or whatever you call it.

Island magic or perhaps magic that is there for us wherever we may live and dream.

Kitchen with a view

This is my kitchen home and it's one of the most beautiful I've worked in. It's at Hollyhock centre on Cortes Island, BC. There are I'm sure better, greater and bigger kitchens with the latest equipment and gadgets, but does it have... an incredible view of the ocean and mountains, and windows so you can have the smell of the ocean waft in? a beautiful French-inspired organic garden/farm right outside the door where you can stroll for your produce and herbs? wooden counters, shelves and tables that remind you of an old country kitchen but with professional equipment and pantries stocked full of ingredients? cooks who have interesting hobbies like goat herding, book writing, playing music and cheese making in their spare time? people visiting who are coming to change themselves and the world? This is my world and I wanted to share a glimpse of it. Hollyhock (www.hollyhock.ca) is a non profit educational institute dedicated to personal, professional and organizational development that advances consciousness, connection and learning toward solutions for a better future. For over 30 years, it has been a special magical place, nestled between the forest and ocean on the south eastern tip of Cortes Island, BC, about 160 kms north of Vancouver. It is run by paid staff and a volunteer service program.

Caroline on Cortes

It is 3 pm and I just finished my day shift in the Hollyhock kitchen, which started at 5:30 am, with breakfast and then lunch service for 135 people.

I am sitting at the wooden table in the incredibly beautiful Hollyhock garden, filled with flowers, produce, and herbs. Any photos I take never seem to do it justice, the incredible beautiful of it all. It reminds me of the famous Tangled Garden by MacDonald, but prettier, and if we understand gardening we know that messy English gardens are actually well planned out gardens. This garden reminds me of people of Cortes and living here. There is structure but wildness at the same time. Like anywhere else, people have jobs, go to work daily like, they try to make ends meet, and they often take care of kids and extended families.

But at the same time, there is a sense of wildness and freedom to the people here and their lifestyles, and that's why they are attracted to here or perhaps the island was attracted to them and has held them captive. I often hear people coming here for a short time, but stay because of the incredible beauty of the scenery and nature. It's like a god or goddess, seducing you at every turn, enticing you to watch his or her movements and come play outside in its beauty. And because they are captured by its beauty, they will do whatever they can to stay on the island. So this love comes first, and what they do, secondary. They work to live on this island, and if the island gods or goddesses like you, they reward you, but that's another story.

I have several pantries from where I gather my ingredients and inspirations to cook from, but the garden is by far my favourite and the one I am most giddy about. I love meandering the garden seeing what is there and talking to the farmers about what is at its peak and needs to be used right away, what is coming up and what they grow all season. I love that it's not just a garden but the produce and herbs and interspersed among all the flowers, which are used to decorate the centre and rooms, and we can use in our food as well, which I adore doing. It's not exactly a farm, more like an edible garden. Because there are hundreds of flowers and many of them edible, I need to consult with the farmers for the size, taste and colours. There is actually list that is posted we can refer to. I've always loved using flowers to decorate with and be part of the food, so I am excited by this.

Farm-to-table cooking is one of the reasons I was attracted to Hollyhock. I've always loved the concept and we tried to do that at the restaurant, but to actually live and work in a place where the farm is right out the back door and works in sync with the kitchen is special to say the least. I get to see what is growing every day, and talk to the farmers about what I want harvested for the next meal and how much. When my delivery comes in just picked, with some remnants of the earth like dirt and ear wigs or worms, it feels like the stork bringing in a new delivery and I am excited. I had thoughts about what to do with it before, but actually seeing, feeling and tasting the produce inspires me often to do something different. For example, I asked for some rainbow chard, and when I saw it come in this morning, it was so incredibly beautiful I couldn't bring myself to change it by cooking it, so I decided that I would slice it thinly and keep it raw, and then I cut up the chard stems in a spiced hot oil mixture, which I put on the greens so that they deflated it slightly but kept it's character. It's really important for me to keep the character of produce in particular and I hate when it's over cooked or over touched so you can't recognize it or it loses it's original character and personality.

And because almost outside the kitchen door is the ocean, you could say there is ocean-to-table, or should I say ocean to people. Once a week, they bring the guests down to the beach by the ocean for a pre-dinner oyster reception. There are also loads of calms on the beach and we have a salmon dinner once a week for guests. Besides this, the kitchen is mainly vegetarian and mostly vegan and gluten-free when I cook :). Hollyhock's mission is to nourish, inspire and support people making change in the world. I love that my food is part of this equation.

I am the sky and everything else is the weather. Pema Chodron

Wheels up, I am off to the west coast for the summer!  What? Where to now is the usual reaction from my friends, more in excitement and curiosity than in disapproval or criticism, and that’s why they are  my friends.

One of the things I’ve learned along the way, and it seems simple but actually quite hard to do because it takes awhile to get to know the true nature of people, is that you need to surround yourself with positive people that will support you for who you are, and want the best for you. In short, good mirrors, because I’ve had my share of distorted mirrors.

I got back to Ottawa from my travels to Whistler- Japan-Hawaii, and got a  yummy offer to cook food at the Hollyhock retreat centre (www.hollyhock.ca) on Cortes Island in BC. Hollyhock is dedicated to inspire, nourish and support people making the world better, with a wide array of conferences and programs. 

As usual when I take a new direction, it’s easy to say “yes” to it at the time, but it may take a few steps. In my case, it’s two planes, two ferries, a few shuttles and car rides, and a big leap of faith.
 
I am nervous. What about you may wonder? Everything. It’s been hard to leave for me to leave my past behind, my reputation, my cred behind in the city where I gained them, and start afresh and recreate, even though I have yearned to go out west for awhile and am excited by it. 

I am heading to a place that seems far away and remote, and I don’t know much except that people say it is incredibly beautiful. I had signed up for a meditation retreat with Michael Stone at Hollyhock last summer but had to cancel, and I wondered when I would be able to return. Like many, I had heard about Hollyhock and wanted to go there one day. Well the one day is today!  

When I asked my friend who is working at Hollyhock what I should pack, she said to travel light, you have everything you'll need here but there is nothing much on the island. I didn't really get this but I packed rather lightly anyway because I knew it would be hard enough to get there, never mind carrying a lot of luggage. And I knew I would find out over time what she meant. 

I hope you’ll join me, virtually at least, on this journey. I can’t wait to share it with you!

Pause where it is blooming

Free yoga on Parliament Hill sponsored by Lululemon on Wednesdays!

I come back to Ottawa from my travels and it is in full bloom, and I love that. I love how the city comes alive in the summer, not only the weather and nature, but it seems that even the  people come alive as well from the deep freeze of winter.

 

With the arrival of summery weather, I feel a collective sigh of relief.  It's like we are children again, barefoot and running through the grass into the sunshine and laughing.

We just can't get enough it and we appreciate it so much. That's the thing that's great about living somewhere like here, the appreciation and gratitude we have when the weather is nice, and the summer comes. The thing is we know it won't last, that it is has a time limit, and it will disappear so quickly.

 

 

And because we understand this, we tend to make different choices from the winter. We might put off some paperwork to go out to a patio for drinks with friends, just because we know it won't be forever. We might take up a friend for an offer to go to the lake for a swim or to a cottage though we had some other plans. We might take a break from our chores and go outside for a walk before the sun sets.

I love strolling the streets, because that's what we do in Ottawa in the summer, stroll. I believe we have different steps or beats here for different temperatures. You might not get this if you're in one of those warmer climates all year around, but might find it interesting so hear me out.

I feel like it's best explained through music. It's like we walk in a staccato beat when it's very cold. Quick detached beats of short duration, we hold our breaths, go outside to grin and bear it.

But when the warm weather comes, it's like a whole note, the longest note, we breath out to let go of the stresses and stressors of our lives. We stroll. And this time has arrived. We're in whole note season!

I love all seasons and the nature and sports in them. Each season has it's own character and beat. We have four but the winter seems to grab an inordinate amount of our time and head space.  It feels like we spend a lot of energy here keeping warm, coming in from the cold, talking about the weather and how cold it is, buying clothes to keep us warmer, consuming food and drink that will warm us up, looking for partners to keep us warm.

I love the summer for how we as a city we relax and tumble into the grass. It seems as there is a collective awakening and there is an incredible amount of activities to do outdoors. It's like being at the carnival and wondering what ride you should go on next. At the end of the day, we might be a bit burnt from being out in the sun too long and tired from squeezing in as many rides and games as possible before we have to come inside. But it's a different exhaustion, because it's doing what you love.

We don't have a remote where can push the stop or pause button for the season to wait for us. It goes so quickly, like our lives. Let's not waste it doing things we don't want to do, or minimize the parts that we don't like.

At the end of the day, it's the small things that truly matter and makes our lives meaningful.

Like eating gelato that drips on you because you can't eat it fast enough as it's melting, watching the incredible array of colours of the sunset by the water and being grateful for being alive to watch it, taking your kids to the sprinkler water park and joining in and laughing because you haven't done that since you were their age, and walking barefoot in the grass because you can

.

A duck out of water, but in water, so it's happy

Pause where it is blooming, wherever it may be.

Love, Caroline xo

Feeding the soul

Everytime I see one, it reminds me of my childhood and I have to try. It instantly makes me feel young and there is laughter from my belly. I love that, especially as I have been feeling a bit under the weather. Try it. Skip, jump, swing and slide, and if you are brave enough, you will do it with people watching. Why should things that are fun and free only be for kids?! Why is there a best before date on fun?! Our mind might think it's silly but our heart knows and is nourished by it. And that is how I feed my soul when it is hungry. Xo